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Thursday, June 7, 2012

To Breathe or Not To Breathe

Last night, I posed this question for all of The Foreign Domestic Facebook fans:

Question:  When was the last time you noticed the sound of your own breathing?

My answer: The last time my husband pointed out the fact that I was breathing "too heavily." 

I also shared that there was more to the story and I promised to share the rest of the story in today's post.  

So here's the story...

There we were, sitting on the couch watching a movie a couple of months ago, and Scott points out that I'm breathing heavily through my nose.  A few minutes later, he shared that when I breathe heavily through my nose, it's difficult for him to sleep at night--not snoring, just breathing.  He went on to give me guidance on how breathing through my mouth would be better.  I thought this was interesting for 2 reasons: 
  1. I don't snore and nobody has ever heard me snore (or nobody's ever told me that I do).  Talk in my sleep?  Sure, from time to time.  Throw a fist in someone's face (unknowingly, mind you)?  Yes, it has happened before.  But snore?  Nope, not me.  
  2. Scott snores {thank goodness I'm a heavy sleeper}  In my world someone who snores shouldn't complain about the "heavy breathing" of the person sleeping next to them. But, then again, he was denying the fact that he even snores.
I'm seriously laughing to myself as I type this right now and recall the conversations we've had about this very topic---oh boy!  Here's the gist of two of our many "heavy breathing" conversations: 

-At Night- 
Scott:  [Nudging me in the middle of the night] Hey, Kirsten...you're breathing kinda hard through your nose right now.
Me: [Half asleep] Oh really?  You could hear that over your snoring?

-The Next Morning-

Friends, you can't imagine the shocked look on my face when I woke up one morning and saw Scott wearing ear plugs in bed! Hahaha...yes, this is true!

Scott:  [Taking his ear plugs out] Hey, everything okay? 
Me:  Yep, I'm fine.
Scott:  You were breathing kinda hard through your nose last night.  
Me:  You know I have to breathe to stay alive, right?
Scott:  Well, maybe you could breathe through your mouth? 
Me Umm...{speechless}.  I don't know if you know this, but you snore kinda loud so I don't think you have room to talk about me simply breathing.  Why are you wearing ear plugs?  I'd have to wear a soundproof headphones to keep your snoring out. 

Scott:  I don't snore, I had my adenoids taken out when I was younger. 
Me:  Well, it didn't work because you do snore.  One of these nights, I'm going to record you so you can hear yourself and then you won't complain about my breathing.  

Yes, I threatened (if that's even the right word) to record my husband's snoring while he sleeps so he could hear just how loud it is compared to my breathing.  I mean, that would at least put things in perspective for him, right?  But for a couple of months the threat laid dormant and I hoped that he'd somehow manage to find away to sleep without my breathing disrupting him.  I should add that Scott did say, on several occasions, that it was more his problem than mine and I shouldn't worry about it.  But there was something about waking up with him wearing ear plugs after he snored all night hahah...

And then it happened.  Yesterday afternoon, as I was working on the computer, my handsome and loving husband took a nap... and the snoring commenced.  Without hesitation, I reached for my hi-tech audio recorder (thanks, again, to my mom and dad--who would've thought I would end up using it for more than capturing sound bites for news reports?).  

The handy device I used to set the record straight.
After 32 seconds of recording, I had enough evidence.  When he awoke from his nap, I shared the evidence with him, we had a good laugh together, and I answered his questions.  Yes, that's you, and I don't know how I manage to sleep at night.  Actually, {between you and me} I think there's something comforting about his snores--when he does, at least I know he's there.



  1. Hey there Kirsten, James here keeping things going for Loretta. I laughed while reading this. Loretta did the same to prove I snore and we cut-up about it an entire weekend. Hope it was fun for ya'll too! Well, ya'll take care now! James

  2. hahaha Thanks for sharing that, James! Please give my regards to Loretta :)

  3. lately i notice all my breathing because as a pregnant woman...there is a different way i breathe now. the hubby says i snore a lot too! lol at having evidence for your husband!

  4. AHAHAAAA! LOVE this. My man could never hear my breathing over his monstrous snoring!

  5. Very funny! My husband snores also - sometimes so loudly that he wakes even himself up! I have no idea how I get any sleep either - sheer exhaustion I think! Hang in there! :)

  6. Too cute! Thanks for the giggle!


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